I Get You. Let Me Explain.

I’m Denise G. Lee, confidence booster in life, plan maker, and all ‘round partner in coaching you to the greatness you were born to be.

I help savvy and successful business owners like you heal from old emotional wounds, equip you with new and better ways to deal with stress, and see things for how they are, not for how you’d like them to be. 

As an emphatic introvert (I am curious and want to investigative), I want to understand the source of your problems. With this, I work with you to create  a customized plan that is realistic for your stage of business and life. 

I understand how lack of clarity and stress can cause problems in your life. Let me help you understand yourself at a deeper level with life coaching so that you make the right decisions, without hesitation or uncertainty. 

Talking with a stranger about your personal life is not easy. You may fear judgment or criticism. In fact, you may think, “Denise doesn’t understand the pain I went through.”

Well, let’s break the ice. In the next section, I will share with you a few details about my life. Although we may not share the same life story, you will find we share similar experiences about feeling low and misunderstood.

A turbulent childhood and unstable early adulthood

I was raised by Sierra-Leonean immigrants. On the surface it looked like we had obtained the American dream, complete with a little white-poodle I named, ‘Buster.’ While everything looked picture perfect from the outside, complete with family portraits and expensive furniture, the emotional walls inside each of us were moldy and decayed.  

Although I raised in an upper middle class neighborhood, myself and my two older brothers felt a complete lack of safety and security within our upscale home. We did not complain, partially because we didn’t understand nor had the words to explain the pain we all felt.

While my father was absent pursuing his obsession with women and money, my mother desperately clung onto me for love and attention. Because of her own unresolved trauma issues, my mother abused me sexually, physically and verbally. Instead of blaming her, I blamed myself for not having the smarts to run away from her quick enough.

The rage from not having my emotional needs met did a great job (so I thought) of masking away the pain. I withdrew from people and enjoyed watching hours of pornography and romance novels. Little did I know that my compulsion to consume lust-filled content would later bloom into a full-blown sex addiction.

To make matters worse, low self esteem got me involved in uninteresting personal and professional activities which affirmed the belief that my dreams and wishes had to come second to the approval of others. I stayed at jobs and in relationships that slowly and steadily eroded my confidence. There was little to no foundation to build anything of meaning because I felt so hollow and empty inside. 

I masked away the pain with sarcasm and comfort eating because I was dishonest with myself and others. Everything I did kept me stuck repeating old and destructive patterns. 

This emotional quicksand had to end. I needed a strategy to help me overcome not just the anxiety, but the need to please others in all areas of my life.