Compulsive Work Habits: What They’re Really Costing You
- Updated: May 19, 2025
Hi there. I’m Denise, a healing and leadership coach—and if you’re like most leaders I work with, you’re no stranger to pressure. You want to build something meaningful, stay grounded, and still have a life outside the metrics. But in the push for progress, many of us slip into something we rarely talk about: compulsive behavior.
It’s not always obvious. In fact, it often looks like dedication, drive, or “just being thorough.” But underneath the overworking, stat-checking, or relentless planning is a deeper pattern that quietly erodes your clarity, your energy—and sometimes, your relationships.
In this article, we’ll unpack what compulsive behavior actually is, how it differs from addiction, and what you can do to find a healthier rhythm before burnout sneaks in. Let’s start with what this pattern really looks like in leadership and business.
🧭 What You’ll Learn in This Guide
What Is Compulsive Behavior—and Why It’s So Easy to Miss?
Compulsive behavior is when you feel a strong need to do certain things over and over. Doing these things can make you feel better for a little while, but they can mess up your life if you don’t control them.
For example in business, you may have a compulsive habit of constantly checking your email or your business stats. While checking stats can be useful, doing it too often might not really help your business much.
In business, we often hear that we should focus on delivering high quality and making more money. While aiming for excellence is important, if this drive becomes an obsession, it can cause serious problems.
Next, let’s discuss why addiction is similar to compulsive behavior in more detail.
Compulsive Behavior is Not the Same as Addiction
Compulsive behavior and addiction can be mixed up, but they’re actually quite different. Addiction usually means you rely on a substance like drugs or alcohol, either physically or mentally. You can also become addicted to people, which is called codependency.
Think of compulsions like scratching an itch. You feel a strong urge to scratch, and it gives you a bit of relief, but if you keep scratching, you can hurt yourself.
Addiction, on the other hand, is like constantly wearing a tight bandage to cover a wound. It might hide the pain for a while, but it becomes a part of your daily life and can cause more problems in the long run.
Addictions need complete devotion to the desired object or idea
For example, if you have addiction to free stuff, you might spend a lot of time searching for information online, even when you already have reliable answers.
You might ignore complaints about being too busy looking for info, which can cause issues. This shows an addictive habit of constantly seeking validation through gathering information. It is not one specific behavior but a whole lifestyle of hopping from one source to another.
Both behaviors can be harmful, but compulsive behavior is trickier because it can seem like you’re just being really diligent or dedicated, especially in business. You can read more about the differences in this article.
Next, let’s talk about some specific examples of compulsive behavior at work.
What Compulsion Looks Like in Business (and Why It Gets Praised)
In the 2015 movie “The Intern,” we see a clear example of compulsive behavior. The plot follows a 70-year-old widower, Ben Whittaker (played by Robert De Niro), who becomes a senior intern at a fashion website. He forms an unlikely friendship with the company’s workaholic CEO, Jules Ostin (played by Anne Hathaway).
Jules is constantly inspecting how clothes are folded and packed. To corporate America, her attention to detail is great, but it comes at a high cost. Her husband feels increasingly neglected due to her ambitious nature. Jules’s masculine energy of doing, striving, controlling, and commanding crowds out her husband’s efforts to connect with her. Ben, a retired executive, helps Jules find balance.
The movie ends with Jules realizing she needs to make drastic changes to save her marriage. But real life isn’t always as forgiving as movies.
Real-Life Examples of CEOs Ruining Their Personal Lives
There are plenty of examples of CEOs and business owners whose excessive behaviors have harmed their personal lives. Take Steve Jobs, for example. He was obsessed with making Apple’s products perfect, which strained his relationships with family and friends. Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon, also faced personal problems, possibly because he was so focused on his business.
Then there’s Marissa Mayer, who used to be the CEO of Yahoo. She made headlines for working incredibly long weeks, sometimes up to 130 hours. While she achieved a lot at work, people wondered if such a hectic schedule was sustainable and if it affected her health and relationships.
Compulsion impacts the academic world too
And don’t think this is limited to just business owners. Even in the academic world, compulsive behaviors can ruin your life. In a three-part series, the WSJ uncovered the downfall of a once-respected antitrust lawyer.
Joshua Wright, once a leading figure in antitrust law, saw his career unravel due to his compulsive sexual behaviors. He juggled multiple extramarital affairs, including with his students at George Mason University, leveraging his position to maintain these relationships.
The downfall began with a breakup text to Elyse Dorsey, one of his former mistresses, who exposed his misconduct. This led to widespread allegations of sexual harassment and abuse of power, ultimately costing Wright his consulting business, university position, and reputation.
Now that we’ve discussed real and made-up examples of compulsive behavior, let’s look at what causes these habits. Understanding this might make you feel better if you’ve been blaming yourself for lacking willpower.
When basic needs aren't met now or even during their childhood, some people try to make up for it by overdoing other things, like work or success.
What Drives Compulsive Work Habits? The Deeper Roots You May Be Ignoring
Now that we know what compulsive behavior is and have seen some examples, let’s talk about why people develop these tendencies.
1. Tough Childhood
Growing up without enough love, safety, or attention can lead to compulsive behavior. When basic needs aren’t met, some people try to make up for it by overdoing other things, like work or success.
2. Lots of Stress
Feeling stressed all the time can make you do things compulsively. When you’re always on edge, your brain looks for ways to feel better, even if it’s not healthy.
3. Wanting to Everything to Be Perfect
Wanting everything to be perfect can make you act compulsively. When you feel like nothing’s good enough, you might keep trying too hard to reach an impossible goal.
4. Scared of Failing
Being scared of failing can push you to do things compulsively. Especially in business, where there’s a lot of pressure to succeed, you might end up working too much and getting too obsessed with every little detail.
5. No Boundaries
Not having clear boundaries between work and personal life can make you work too much. If work takes over everything, you might start working compulsively because you never take time to relax.
Now that we’ve talked about why compulsive behavior happens, let’s see what can go wrong if you don’t get help for it. We’ll cover that in the next section.
The Hidden Toll of Compulsion on Your Work, Health, and Relationships
Compulsive behavior can really mess up both your business and personal life if you don’t do something about it. Here are some ways unchecked compulsions will hurt you.
Feeling Burned Out
Working too much without breaks leads to burnout. It makes you less productive, creative, and happy with your job. Plus, it can cause serious health problems like depression and constant tiredness.
Strained Relationships
Compulsive behavior often strains relationships with family, friends, and coworkers. Your loved ones might feel ignored, leading to fights and maybe even breaking up friendships or relationships.
Less Productive
Even though you might think being compulsive makes you more productive, it usually does the opposite. Trying too hard to be perfect can slow down your decision-making and make you overthink everything.
Health Troubles
Working too much and being stressed all the time can make you sick. It can lead to heart problems, high blood pressure, and trouble sleeping. And when you’re not healthy, you can’t run your business as well.
If you are reading this list and thinking, “I need more balance in my life,” read the next section where I share some ideas to stop compulsive habits or behaviors.
How to Break the Cycle of Compulsive Work Habits
Compulsion thrives in overdrive. If you’ve been stuck in the loop of “just one more task,” it’s time to reset. Here’s how to start rebuilding a work life that actually honors your energy—not just your output:
🧭 Know Your Limits (Then Actually Honor Them)
If work is bleeding into your nights, weekends, or relationships, it’s not sustainable. Define a real stopping point. Set digital guardrails—yes, even if that means using an app to lock yourself out of email after hours.
🤝 Stop White-Knuckling It Alone
Admitting you’re overwhelmed isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom. Whether it’s a therapist, coach, or trusted peer, get support. You’re not supposed to “manage it all” in silence.
🧘🏽♀️ Pause Before You Power Through
That urgent rush? It’s not always truth—it’s trauma. Unless you’re in emergency services, nothing will explode if you step back. Practicing mindfulness (even 2 minutes of stillness) helps you sort real urgency from survival-mode spinning.
🎯 Celebrate Progress—Not Perfection
Ambition without pause leads to emptiness. High performers often skip the celebration step entirely. Break that habit. Honor the micro-wins. Otherwise, your brain will never register that you’re safe to slow down.
💪 Move Your Body, Not Just Your Inbox
Your nervous system needs an outlet that isn’t work. Whether it’s yoga, lifting, or dancing alone to Beyoncé—move. Not for the badge of “balance,” but because your body wasn’t built to live in a chair.
🛑 Stop Trying to Be a Solo Superhero
Just because you can do everything doesn’t mean you should. Delegate. Ask for help. Let people rise. You’re not failing—you’re leading with trust.
Coming up next: the truth no productivity hack will tell you.
(That’s your lead-in to your final thoughts section.)
What Most Business Owners Ask About Compulsive Habits (But Don’t Say Out Loud)
What’s the difference between compulsive behavior and workaholism?
Workaholism is often glorified, but compulsive behavior is what’s driving it. Compulsion is rooted in emotional avoidance—doing something over and over to relieve internal discomfort. You might call it “drive,” but it’s often anxiety in disguise.
How do I know if I’m being productive—or just compulsive?
Check the why behind your behavior. Are you working because it truly matters… or because you’re afraid of what might happen if you stop? True productivity nourishes you. Compulsion drains you.
Can compulsive habits really hurt my business?
Absolutely. Compulsive habits can lead to micromanagement, burnout, missed opportunities, and fractured trust in your team or clients. They create the illusion of control while actually slowing down your growth.
What causes compulsive work patterns in high achievers?
Many high achievers grew up equating love with performance. Over time, survival strategies like over-functioning, perfectionism, or people-pleasing become baked into their work habits—even when they’re no longer needed.
Can you actually break compulsive habits without losing your edge?
Yes—but it requires conscious effort and emotional support. Boundaries, emotional literacy, and aligned leadership tools can help you stay sharp without spiraling. You can be focused and free.
Before You Go, A Truth About Compulsion and Control
If you’ve been calling it “drive” or “dedication” but deep down, you’re running on fear, pressure, or old survival habits—you’re not alone.
Compulsive work habits often look productive on the outside. But inside? They quietly erode your peace, your focus, and your ability to truly live.
You don’t need to keep spinning plates just to feel worthy.
You deserve more than burnout dressed up as ambition.
If you’re ready to untangle what’s driving the compulsion—and build a business that’s both sustainable and soul-honoring—I’d be honored to support you.
💛 Work with me, Denise G. Lee – Together, we’ll untangle the deeper patterns holding you back and create clear, practical strategies that match you.
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And just in case no one’s reminded you lately:
Leadership isn’t about being perfect.
It’s about being present. Being willing.
Showing up with your scars, not just your strengths.
