How to Fix a Toxic Work Environment You Didn’t Realize You Created
- Updated: May 25, 2025
You didn’t mean to create chaos—but now it’s on you to clean it up.
It started with a phone call—from someone’s mom.
Not a client. Not your attorney.
Your employee’s mother.
She said her daughter had been hospitalized for exhaustion.
Seventy-hour workweeks. No boundaries.
She hadn’t taken a real break in months.
And you’re blindsided.
Because that employee? She was one of your best.
Never complained. Took initiative. Stayed late.
You thought she was driven. Focused. Capable.
You didn’t see burnout.
You saw leadership potential.
And now you’re sitting with this gut-punch realization:
Your company—the one you built from scratch—is a toxic work environment.
Not the kind with screaming matches and public takedowns.
The quiet kind.
The kind where people smile, over-function, and break down in private.
And here’s the hardest part:
You didn’t know.
But it still happened on your watch.
This post is for the leader who’s realizing that hard work, high standards, and loyalty can still produce harm when not grounded in emotional responsibility.
If you’ve just woken up to the cost of that harm—this isn’t about shame.
It’s about repair.
Let’s talk about how you got here—and what it takes to lead your team out of the mess you never meant to make.
You Didn’t Mean to Create a Toxic Workplace—But Here’s How to Fix It
The Blind Spots That Let Toxic Culture Grow
You weren’t malicious. You were busy. And that’s how it happened.
Toxic cultures don’t always start with bad people.
They often start with good people avoiding hard things.
You were focused on growth.
On closing deals, protecting margins, securing contracts.
You weren’t ignoring your team—you were trusting them to handle it.
But delegation without emotional awareness becomes abdication.
Here are the blind spots that quietly rot a work environment—especially when you’re scaling fast and staying high-level.
😶 1. Avoiding Hard Conversations
You let the small stuff slide:
A passive-aggressive comment in the group Slack.
The eye roll in the team meeting.
The missed deadline that got smoothed over with a joke.
You told yourself:
“They’re adults. They’ll figure it out.”
“We’re too busy for drama.”
“That’s just their personality.”
But silence is interpretation.
And in the absence of clarity, dysfunction thrives.
🧍🏽♂️ 2. Fear of Rejection Masquerading as “Being Easy to Work With”
You didn’t set boundaries.
Instead, you over-accommodated.
Decided to let people steamroll process because you wanted to be “collaborative” or “low ego.”
Really? You were afraid.
Afraid of being the bad guy.
You couldn’t stomach the idea that they’d leave.
Maybe you were afraid of being seen as controlling or corporate.
So you let resentment pile under the radar—until it showed up as disengagement, burnout, or gossip.
🫥 3. Ignoring the Disorder and Discomfort (Because Things Still Got Done)
Work was getting done. Revenue was flowing. Clients weren’t complaining.
So when the vibes were off?
When certain team members avoided each other?
When people stopped turning on their cameras or missed standups?
You brushed it off.
But output doesn’t equal health.
And consistent silence is rarely a sign of peace.
🧱 4. Relying Too Heavily on Your Lieutenants (Who Quietly Became Tyrants)
You thought you were empowering leadership.
But while you were out pitching investors and locking in deals, your right hand became a gatekeeper—and your name became a threat.
“Well, [your name] won’t like that.”
“That’s not how [you] want it.”
“We’ll need approval from the top.”
“You better get it right or [you] will flip.”
You became a symbol—not a person.
Feared. Revered. Unreachable.
You didn’t build a team.
You built a kingdom.
And no one told you that your most loyal advisors were weaponizing your silence in the name of “standards.”
The truth?
A toxic work environment can flourish in the shadow of a visionary who’s too far removed from the relational weeds.
Now that you see it, it’s not about guilt—it’s about taking the crown off, rolling up your sleeves, and becoming present enough to lead what you built.
I’ve had people tell me that their work isn’t bad.
— Denise G. Lee (@DeniseGLee) August 1, 2024
They say, “This place has a great benefits program!”
Then they tell me about all the ways they are using drugs and numbing their pain from being in a soul-crushing place that wouldn’t care if they dropped dead because there’s a…
Is Your Business a Hellscape (and You Missed It)?
You don’t always realize your office has turned toxic until someone crashes.
Sometimes that someone ends up in a hospital bed, strapped to a heart monitor.
I know—because that was me.
I remember telling the nurse, “I think I need to leave my job.”
Then I whispered what I’d been afraid to say out loud for years:
“This place is going to kill me.”
Twelve years later, I’m a business owner. And here’s what I know:
No matter how much you like your people…
No matter how great your intentions…
If you’re not actively maintaining a healthy culture, you’re at risk of leading a toxic one.
So if you’re wondering whether your team secretly hates coming in every day—
Or if your business name is getting roasted on Glassdoor…
Here are the hard-to-ignore signs you might be running a workplace people survive instead of thrive in:
🔒 1. Poor Communication + No Transparency
Nobody knows what’s happening.
People feel left out, confused, or constantly catching up.
There’s a silent culture of “just figure it out.”
🐍 2. Cliques, Exclusion, and Playground Politics
Projects go to the inner circle.
Others feel invisible.
You built a workplace that runs on popularity, not potential.
🪤 3. Tolerating Toxic Leadership
You ignore the manager who’s micromanaging people to tears…
Because they’re efficient.
And now your best people are quietly shutting down.
🧨 Perry Belcher nailed it:
“Nothing kills a great employee faster than watching you tolerate a bad one.”
🧊 4. Apathy, Disengagement, and Checked-Out Energy
Your team’s not angry—they’re just numb.
They show up, smile, go home… and vent to their therapist or TikTok.
You’re not inspiring commitment. You’re hosting slow-motion exits.
🚪 5. High Turnover (and Quiet Quitting Before That)
People don’t just leave. They detach, then bounce.
The warning signs were there.
You just weren’t paying attention.
🕳 6. No Growth, No Development, No Path
You can’t just throw out a 50-cent raise and call it advancement.
People need meaning, mentorship, and real movement.
Otherwise, you’re just feeding another burnout cycle.
🔥 7. Burnout Is the Default Setting
Your “best” people are walking cortisol spikes.
Everyone’s always on. Always tired. Always one Slack ping away from snapping.
🙄 8. Gossip, Backchannels, and Passive Aggression
If you’ve got side texts during team meetings or code language for “bad moods,”
You’ve got politics.
And it’s costing you more than productivity—it’s killing trust.
😶 9. No Feedback Loop—Just Fear
Your team doesn’t give you feedback because they don’t feel safe.
You only hear problems when they’re already explosions.
Silence is not loyalty. Silence is suppression.
🚨 10. No Recognition, No Humanity
If people only hear from you when something goes wrong—
They’ll eventually assume they’re always wrong.
A sticky note goes further than a quarterly shoutout.
Don’t underestimate the power of small, real praise.
🤢 11. Unethical Behavior or Values That Only Live in a Binder
If you claim “integrity” but look the other way when someone lies to a client,
Your culture knows the truth.
And they’re adapting to it—at your expense.
If any of this made your stomach tighten—don’t panic.
You’re not the first leader who’s created a culture that accidentally wounded the people keeping it running.
But now that you see it?
You’ve got a choice.
Let’s talk about how to fix it.
8 Ways to Fix a Toxic Work Environment (That Actually Work)
No theory. Just what actually works.
1. Fix the Way You Communicate—Before They Shut Down Entirely
If your people don’t know what’s going on, they’ll fill in the gaps with anxiety, gossip, or apathy.
Clear, regular updates—even if it’s “we don’t have an answer yet”—build trust.
Hold real meetings where people can ask questions without fear of retaliation.
You’re not too busy to do this. You’re too exposed not to.
🧠 Why this works:
According to Gallup, only 13% of employees strongly agree that leadership communicates effectively. When people feel in the dark, they detach or revolt. Period.
2. Make It Safe to Belong—Without Performing
If people have to code-switch, mask, or kiss up just to survive… it’s not a culture—it’s a game. And they’re tired.
Inclusive workplaces aren’t about DEI statements—they’re about dignity.
Give your people space to show up as they are. Don’t just tolerate difference. Honor it.
3. Develop Leaders Who Don’t Bleed on Their Teams
Don’t just promote high performers. Train them. Mentor them.
A toxic work culture usually starts with a mid-level leader who never learned how to handle feedback or tension without control or fear.
If you don’t equip them, your silence becomes complicity.
🧠 Why this works:
40% of employees left their jobs in 2022 because they saw no room for advancement (McKinsey). But many left because the wrong people got promoted.
4. Recognize People Before They Become Resentful
People don’t need a parade. But they do need to know they matter.
Tell them when they do good work. Don’t wait until the annual review.
You don’t have to fake cheerlead—just be present enough to notice.
🧠 Why this works:
Deloitte found that recognition boosts engagement by 60%. Translation: a little appreciation keeps bitterness from taking root.
5. Protect Work-Life Boundaries Like You’d Protect Your Bottom Line
Stop praising the 10pm emails.
Start praising boundaries, restoration, and well-rested brains.
Overworking isn’t loyalty. It’s a trauma response—and eventually, it backfires.
🧠 Why this works:
Hubstaff’s data shows 77% of employees feel burned out—even when 60% claim to have work-life balance. The math doesn’t lie. The culture does.
6. Don’t Tolerate Bullies—No Matter How “Valuable” They Seem
If someone’s causing emotional harm, it’s not a personality clash. It’s a liability.
Train your team. Set clear policies.
Make it easier to report bad behavior than to ignore it.
🧠 Why this works:
In 2021, the Workplace Bullying Institute reports nearly 80 million U.S. workers are affected. Bullying breeds turnover, trauma, and lawsuits. Cut it off early.
7. Build a Culture Where Accountability Isn’t Weaponized
When people mess up, talk to them. Don’t ghost, shame, or punish with silence.
Create a feedback loop that’s honest without humiliation.
You don’t have to be soft—but you do have to be fair.
🧠 Why this works:
Psych safety increases engagement, innovation, and retention. And when people trust how you handle mistakes, they stop hiding them.
8. Actually Live Your Values—or Stop Pretending You Have Them
It’s one thing to say “integrity” is a core value. It’s another to enforce it when your best salesperson crosses a line.
Culture isn’t what you post on your website.
It’s what your people survive, tolerate, or feel protected from—day after day.
🧠 Why this works:
When your values only exist on paper, people stop believing anything you say—including when you ask them to give their best.
FAQ: What to Do When You Realize It’s Your Fault
I had no idea this was happening. Am I a bad leader?
No. You’re a human leader who missed some signs. That’s not the end of your credibility—it’s the beginning of your accountability.
This isn’t about shame. It’s about response.
Now that you see what’s broken, the question is: Will you avoid it—or repair it?
What if it’s just one toxic employee ruining things?
That might be true—but if their behavior has gone unchecked, that’s still a leadership problem.
Don’t scapegoat. Do the audit.
Toxicity spreads in the absence of boundaries. One person can cause damage, but a culture that enables it will deepen the wound.
👉 Related: How to Set Emotional Boundaries
Can I fix this without firing anyone?
Sometimes, yes. But only if people are willing to grow.
You can’t force change on someone who’s committed to dysfunction.
Start with clear conversations, new standards, and real consequences. Who steps up—and who reveals themselves—will become obvious fast.
👉 Related: Discipline Without Guilt: How to Stop Overfunctioning and Lead With Clarity
How long does culture change actually take?
Longer than you want. Shorter than you fear—if you’re consistent.
It’s not about one announcement or one apology. It’s about rebuilding psychological safety over time. That means repeated proof: “This isn’t just talk.”
Where should I start if my team doesn’t trust me?
Start with listening. Not defending. Not over-explaining.
Give them a chance to name what’s been hard. Take notes. Absorb it. Then follow up with action that matches what they said they needed—not what makes you look good.
👉 Related: Why Active Listening is Essential for Effective Leadership
Final Thoughts: Repair Starts With You
You didn’t mean to create a toxic work environment—but now you see it.
And once you see it, you can’t unsee it.
You can’t pretend the disengagement is just personality.
You can’t ignore the turnover and call it “market trends.”
You can’t keep trusting lieutenants who cause fear in your name.
If you want to run a business that doesn’t break people—
If you want to lead without losing your soul—
Then this is the moment where everything changes.
You’re not starting over.
You’re starting honest.
💌 Want more grounded leadership truth like this?
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You don’t have to be the kind of leader who causes harm.
But you do have to be the kind of leader who’s willing to own it—and clean it up.
That’s the difference. That’s the work.
And it starts now.
