Workaholism: Signs, Causes, and How to Break Free from Work Addiction
- Updated: March 14, 2025
Do you feel like you have to finish every task, no matter the cost? Do you find yourself constantly working—even at the expense of your health, relationships, or personal happiness? If so, we need to talk about workaholism.
I’m Denise G. Lee, a healing and leadership coach. In my work, I’ve seen firsthand how workaholism can take over lives—especially for high achievers who feel like their worth is tied to their productivity. Society often praises overwork, but few talk about the hidden costs of work addiction.
In this article, we’ll break it all down:
- ✔ What workaholism really is (and what it’s not)
- ✔ The warning signs to watch for
- ✔ How perfectionism and trauma feed the cycle of overworking
- ✔ Practical steps to break free and create a healthier work-life balance
Let’s start by identifying the signs of work addiction and how it might be affecting your life.
Signs You Are Addicted to Work
Having a strong work ethic is a good thing. Being dedicated to your job is admirable. But there’s a fine line between feeling good about your work and working to feel good about yourself.
So how do you know when you’ve crossed that line into workaholism?
Here are some warning signs that you (or someone you know) may be struggling with work addiction:
1. Neglecting Your Personal Life & Self-Care
Your job takes priority over everything else—your family, your friends, your health, and even your basic needs.
Ask yourself:
- ✅ Do your loved ones stop inviting you to events because they know you’ll be too busy working?
- ✅ Is it normal for you to skip breakfast, lunch, or dinner—or worse, forget to eat entirely?
- ✅ Do you inhale your meals in five minutes or less so you can get back to work?
- ✅ When was the last time you washed your hair? Took a real break? Slept more than a few hours?
- ✅ Do you avoid self-care activities like exercise, relaxation, or getting enough sleep because work always comes first?
If your answer is “yes” to most of these, your well-being is taking a backseat to your work.
2. Being Tethered to Technology
Technology helps us work efficiently, but it also fuels workaholism by keeping us constantly connected.
Be honest:
- 📱 Do you obsessively check your phone for work notifications, even when you’re supposed to be resting?
- ⌚ Do you glance at your smartwatch every time it buzzes, even when you’re with loved ones?
- 😴 Can you fall asleep without your phone in your hand, or does the thought of being disconnected make you anxious?
- 💻 Would losing access to your laptop or email cause you to spiral into a full-blown meltdown?
If you can’t mentally “clock out” from work because of your devices, that’s a red flag.
3. Inability to Delegate
Growing a business or managing a career isn’t easy. You may wear many hats—CEO, bookkeeper, content creator, and more. But at some point, you have to let go.
- 🚩 Do you struggle to trust others with tasks, even when you’re overwhelmed?
- 🚩 Do you insist on doing everything yourself, even if it slows down progress?
- 🚩 Do you feel uneasy when someone else takes over a responsibility, fearing they won’t do it “right”?
Workaholics often bottleneck their own success by refusing to delegate, causing unnecessary stress and delays.
4. Constant Need for Achievement
We all like to succeed. But when achievement becomes an obsession, it’s a problem.
- 🛑 Do you push yourself to hit goal after goal, never stopping to celebrate your wins?
- 🛑 Do you feel anxious or worthless if you’re not constantly achieving something?
- 🛑 Have you sacrificed your health, relationships, or happiness just to reach the next milestone?
Your self-worth should not be tied to your productivity. If you only feel “good enough” when you’re working, it’s time to rethink your relationship with work.
In the next section, we’ll dive deeper into why so many workaholics struggle with self-worth—and how to break free from that cycle. Because work addiction isn’t just about long hours; it’s about why you feel the need to work nonstop in the first place.
Behind the perfectionism is fear.
— Denise Lee (@DeniseGLee) August 12, 2023
Fear of:
-messing up
-not viewed as worthy
-being criticized
And that's why so many of us:
-procrastinate
-avoid
Which leads to:
-depression
-anxiety
Love, we live in an imperfect world filled with imperfect people, including you.
You are…
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Equating Your Self-Worth to Your Work
Too many people measure their worth by how much they achieve. Maybe you believe you’re only valuable if you have a certain number of followers, a specific income, or a packed client list. If you don’t hit those numbers, you feel like you’re falling short. If you do reach them, you quickly move the goalpost—because in your mind, it’s never enough.
The problem with this way of thinking? There will always be someone with more. More money. More success. More recognition. And no matter how hard you work, that comparison trap will keep you running in circles.
But here’s where it gets even trickier.
What happens if life throws you a curveball? Or, what if:
- You get sick?
- You lose your job?
- The people who once praised your work suddenly stop paying attention?
- You wake up one day and realize you want to do something completely different?
Your Work Does Not Determine Your Worth
If your self-worth is tied to your work, any change—good or bad—can shake your entire identity. You start questioning your value, wondering if you even matter outside of your accomplishments. That’s not a fulfilling way to live. That’s a trap.
Read this carefully: You have worth because you are alive. Not because of what you’ve done. Not because of what you’re doing now. Simply because you exist.
Your achievements? Great. Your career? Meaningful. But they are not you. They are things you do, not proof of your value as a person.
This brings us to a bigger conversation: the connection between perfectionism and trauma. Because let’s be honest—workaholism isn’t just about ambition. At its core, it often stems from a deep need for approval or validation. If you’ve ever felt like you had to earn love, respect, or security, you already know how this cycle begins.
And that’s exactly what we’re going to talk about next.
The Link Between Workaholism and Perfectionism
Some of you are letting perfectionism run your life. There are rules for everything—how to work, how to act, how to speak, and how to succeed. And if you don’t follow them perfectly, you feel like a failure.
But here’s the hard truth: Perfectionism is a trauma response.
At some point in your life, you learned that being “perfect” was the only way to stay safe—safe from criticism, from judgment, from punishment, from shame. Maybe you grew up in a home where mistakes weren’t tolerated. Maybe you had to be strong, keep up appearances, or meet impossible standards to earn love or approval.
And even though that person—whether it was a parent, a teacher, a sibling, or someone else—is no longer in control, their voice still lives in your head.
- 👉🏾 “Be perfect.”
- 👉🏾 “Hurry up.”
- 👉🏾 “Try harder.”
- 👉🏾 “Be strong.”
- 👉🏾 “Make everyone happy.”
News Flash: Nobody is Perfect
It’s exhausting, isn’t it?
Many people struggling with workaholism are really struggling with perfectionism. They push themselves to work harder, longer, and faster—not because they want to, but because they feel like they have to. The fear of not being good enough, of being judged, or of disappointing someone keeps them stuck in the cycle of overworking.
But let me tell you something—none of us are perfect.
Instead of chasing an impossible standard, try this instead:
- 💛 Work for excellence, not perfection. Do your best, but don’t destroy yourself in the process.
- 💛 Know what is enough. You don’t have to prove your worth by overworking.
- 💛 Please yourself first. Stop living for the approval of others.
- 💛 Work easy. Give yourself permission to rest, slow down, and enjoy life.
- 💛 Be open to learning. Mistakes are not failures—they are lessons.
Workaholism and perfectionism are deeply connected. But the good news? You can break free. And it starts with giving yourself grace.
Some of y'all are letting perfectionism RUIN YOUR LIFE.
— Denise Lee (@DeniseGLee) August 10, 2023
Rules for this.
Procedures for that.
So many damn rules you can't enjoy anything, including yourself at times.
Perfectionism is a trauma response.
You see, you had to be perfect to avoid being yelled at, criticized,…
How to Recover from Workaholism
We need work. But work doesn’t need to have us.
For years, I believed that the harder I worked, the more valuable I was. Maybe you’ve felt the same way—like taking a break means you’re lazy or falling behind. But the truth? Workaholism isn’t a badge of honor. It’s a trap. And if you want to break free, you have to make some intentional decisions to change how you think about work and how you show up in your own life.
Here’s how you can start healing:
1. Recognize the Problem
I am a recovering alcohol and sex addict. When I first joined Alcoholics Anonymous, I learned the first step:
We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
Now, swap out alcohol for work.
We can’t heal from something we refuse to acknowledge. If work is controlling your life—your energy, your health, your relationships—it’s time to admit it. No shame, no judgment. Just honesty. That’s where healing begins.
2. Set Boundaries
If you don’t set boundaries, work will take everything you give it. And let’s be real—work will never say, “Hey, you should stop now.”
Start by looking at your schedule. How many hours do you actually need to work each day? Set a time when work ends—and stick to it. If shutting down feels impossible, use an accountability partner or a time-management app (like Self-Control) that literally locks you out of work apps when it’s time to stop.
3. Prioritize Self-Care
Self-care isn’t just bubble baths and spa days. It’s making sure you eat well, move your body, get enough sleep, and do things that make you feel alive outside of work.
What’s something you used to love doing before work took over? A hobby? A sport? Reading for fun? Start adding it back into your routine—even if it’s just for 10 minutes a day.
4. Practice Mindfulness
If work is always on your mind, your body stays in a constant state of stress. Mindfulness can help you break that cycle.
You don’t have to become a meditation expert—just start small. Take deep breaths. Go for a walk without checking your phone. Pay attention to the present moment instead of running through your to-do list in your head.
5. Reevaluate Your Values
Work is part of your life—but it’s not your whole life.
What else truly matters to you? Your health? Your family? Your faith? Your personal growth? Start making time for those things. Because at the end of your life, you won’t wish you had worked more—you’ll wish you had lived more.
6. Set Realistic Goals
Perfectionism and workaholism go hand in hand. If you constantly feel like you have to do more, better, faster, you’ll never feel like you’ve done enough.
Instead, set goals that challenge you without burning you out. Learn to celebrate progress, not just perfection.
7. Delegate and Collaborate
You don’t have to do everything yourself. If you have a team, trust them. If you’re a solopreneur, consider outsourcing small tasks.
And if you struggle to let go? Ask yourself: Am I holding onto this because no one else can do it, or because I don’t want to let go of control? Big difference.
8. Practice Time Management
Most of us are terrible at estimating how long things take.
Start keeping a journal of how much time you actually spend on different tasks. You might realize you’re overloading yourself with unrealistic expectations—or wasting time on things that don’t matter.
And please, stop multitasking. Studies show it makes you less productive and more stressed. Focus on one thing at a time.
9. Seek Professional Help
If work is your coping mechanism—your escape from stress, emotions, or personal struggles—getting support from a therapist or coach can make a world of difference.
There’s no shame in asking for help. In fact, it’s one of the strongest things you can do.
The image below sums up my tips. Next, I will share my thoughts.
Final Thoughts: Breaking Free from Workaholism
Not everyone who works long hours is a workaholic. A strong work ethic is valuable—when it’s balanced with self-care, rest, and a life outside of work. But when work becomes your identity, your coping mechanism, or your source of self-worth, it’s time to reassess.
Healing from workaholism isn’t about quitting your job or doing less—it’s about working smarter, creating boundaries, and allowing yourself to exist beyond what you produce.
If this article spoke to you, I encourage you to take a step back and ask yourself:
- 🔹 Am I working to live, or am I living to work?
- 🔹 What am I afraid will happen if I stop pushing myself so hard?
- 🔹 How can I start reclaiming time for myself today?
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Drop a comment on this post and let’s talk about it → CLICK HERE
And if you’re struggling to break free from workaholism and need personalized support, send me a message, and let’s work together. You don’t have to figure this out alone.
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