Achieving Balance: A Guide for Business Owners
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As an entrepreneur coach, I often see people who do really well at work but struggle in their personal lives. Many of us try to be happy even when things are tough, sometimes ignoring one part of our life to focus on another.
We might talk about how great our job is while our relationships or health suffer.
But is this the only way? Do we have to give up having a good personal life just to have a successful career?
I don’t think so.
In this article, we’ll talk about how to tell if your work-life balance isn’t right, how we end up in this situation, and ways to fix it. First up, let’s look at signs that your work and personal life aren’t balanced well.
But There is No Such Thing As Work/Life!
You may be reading this after consuming books like “The Work-Life Balance Myth: Rethinking Your Optimal Balance for Success” by David McNeff, which challenges the concept of work-life balance. McNeff argues that there is no true balance between work and life, but rather harmony between different aspects of life.
I always appreciate different perspectives and ideas. They help add context and color to our understanding of living an optimal life.
Personally, I don’t think work-life balance is a myth. This is McNeff’s perspective.
Life gets crazy at times. But it doesn’t have to stay crazy.
We all experience different seasons in our lives, where our focus and priorities may shift depending on the circumstances. There are times when work demands more of our attention, whether it’s due to a critical project, career advancement opportunities, or simply the need to meet deadlines. During these periods, we might find ourselves putting in extra hours and dedicating more energy to our professional responsibilities.
On the other hand, there are moments when family needs take precedence, such as during a health crisis or other significant events that require our presence and support. In these times, our attention naturally shifts to caring for and being with our loved ones, ensuring their well-being and offering our full support.
This article isn’t about teaching you how to create a perfect schedule that works for everyone all the time, including you. Life can and will get crazy at times. It’s about understanding who you are, what works for you, and recognizing signs that you’re heading toward anxiety, compulsion, and burnout.
As a coach, I would never create a plan or suggest steps for anyone without fully understanding their personality, temperament, and preferences. All of this needs to be factored in to create a lifestyle that works best for you. That being said, here are signs that something is terribly wrong with how you’re managing the affairs of your life.
Examples of Work/Life Imbalance:
Unsure if your life is unbalanced? That’s understandable and normal! Many of my past clients found themselves stuck in a fog for years, if not decades, before realizing they were dealing with some form of addiction, depression, anxiety, or mental health issue.
Below are some common signs that you or someone you know may have an unbalanced life.
Workaholism: Imagine someone who spends all their time working, even on weekends and holidays. They might miss family gatherings or cancel plans with friends because they’re always working. They might even forget to eat or sleep properly because they’re so focused on work.
Neglected Relationships: Think of a business owner who is always at the office, even when they don’t need to be. They might miss their child’s soccer game or forget their partner’s birthday because they’re too busy with work. This can make their family and friends feel neglected and unimportant.
Health Neglect: Picture someone who is always stressed and tired because they work too much. They might ignore signs of burnout like headaches or trouble sleeping because they think they need to keep working. This can lead to serious health problems like heart disease, irritable bowl disease or depression.
Financial Overextension: Consider a business owner who invests all their money back into their business, neglecting their personal finances. They might not have savings for emergencies or retirement because they’re too focused on growing their business. This can leave them financially vulnerable in the long run.
Lack of Leisure Time: Imagine someone who never has time for hobbies or relaxation because they’re always working. They might feel constantly stressed and exhausted, with no time to unwind or enjoy life outside of work. This can lead to burnout and a decreased quality of life.
In all of these examples, work takes precedence over other important aspects of life like family, health, and leisure. This imbalance can lead to unhappiness, strained relationships, and negative consequences for both physical and mental well-being.
You may be thinking to yourself, “How did I turn my work from a passion into an obsession that is ruining my health, family, and happiness?” In the next section, we will uncover the reasons how we can prioritize our work above all.
Imagine I took a mirror, smashed it to the ground, and asked you to take a look at yourself through it. Your face would resemble something out of a funhouse: eyes going in two different directions, maybe even two chins! That's how your mind works when experiencing cognitive distortion; everything around you may seem a bit distorted.
How We Create an Unbalanced Life
The reason why we have a poor life balance is due to some type of cognitive distortion. Cognitive distortions are like tricks our minds play on us, making things seem worse than they really are.
Imagine I took a mirror, smashed it to the ground, and asked you to take a look at yourself through it. Your face would resemble something out of a funhouse: eyes going in two different directions, maybe even two chins! That’s how your mind works when experiencing cognitive distortion; everything around you may seem a bit distorted.They can make us see things in a way that isn’t entirely true.
All-or-nothing thinking: A leader like yourself might believe that they must either work long hours and be successful or spend time with family and fail in their business. They see no middle ground, leading to an extreme focus on work at the expense of personal life.
Overgeneralization: If a business owner faces a setback, such as a failed marketing campaign, they may conclude that they are incompetent in all aspects of their business. This broad conclusion overlooks any past successes and can lead to feelings of hopelessness.
Discounting the positive: Even when a business owner achieves success, they may downplay it, focusing only on the challenges or failures they encounter. This mindset prevents them from appreciating their accomplishments and maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
Mind reading: Leaders like yourself may assume that their employees or competitors view them negatively without any evidence to support this belief. This leads to unnecessary stress and paranoia, further disrupting their work-life balance.
Catastrophizing: When faced with a minor setback, such as losing a client, a business owner might imagine the worst possible outcome, such as bankruptcy or failure. This exaggerated thinking heightens anxiety and makes it difficult to maintain perspective.
Emotional reasoning: Business owners may let their emotions dictate their decisions, believing that if they feel overwhelmed by work, it must mean that they are incapable of managing their workload. This can lead to burnout and further imbalance in their work-life situation.
Should statements: Leaders often impose unrealistic expectations on themselves, feeling guilty if they take time off or prioritize personal well-being over work. This mentality perpetuates the cycle of overwork and neglects their personal life.
Labeling: Business owners may label themselves as “workaholics” or “failures” based on specific events or behaviors, ignoring the complexity of their identity and capabilities. This negative self-talk reinforces feelings of imbalance and inadequacy.
10 Steps to Balance Work and Life
Nobody asked us to be superhuman and tackle everything all at once. We’re not trying to make ourselves into a spectacle.
In order to have balance, we must prioritize our mental health. We do this by knowing what matters most and have a good plan so that things don’t get too crazy. Here are some simple steps you can take to find that balance:
Set Boundaries: Make clear rules about when you’ll work and when you won’t. Stick to these rules as much as you can. Try not to mix work with your personal time.
Plan Fun Time: Make time in your schedule for activities you enjoy. It could be anything, like going for a walk, reading a book, or spending time with your family and friends. Doing things you love can help you feel relaxed and happy.
Share the Work: Learn to let others help you with tasks at work. Trust your team to handle some things so you can have more time for yourself.
Stay Present: Take short breaks during the day to relax your mind. You can try things like meditation or just take deep breaths to feel more calm.
Take Care of Yourself: Make sure you’re taking care of your body and mind. Get enough sleep, eat healthy food, and try to exercise regularly. If you’re feeling stressed, talking to someone can help.
Set Achievable Goals: Don’t set goals that are too hard to reach. Break big goals into smaller ones, and celebrate when you achieve them.
Talk Openly: Tell your team and the people in your life what’s important to you and what you need. It’s okay to change your plans if you need to.
Ask for Help: Don’t be afraid to get support when you need it. This could mean getting someone to help with your work or talking to someone who can give you advice.
Think About Your Life: Take some time to think about how things are going for you. If something doesn’t feel right, think about what you can do to make it better.
Be Flexible: Remember, finding balance takes time. It’s okay to change your plans as you go along.
By following these steps and making balance a priority, you can feel happier and more fulfilled in your work and personal life. Remember to be patient with yourself as you work towards finding that balance. The image below summarizes my tips. Next, I will share my final thoughts.
Final thoughts
Finding balance is super important for business owners to feel happy, healthy, and successful overall. By addressing problems and changing the way we think, we can make our lives more satisfying and peaceful.
Be mindful and notice when you try to downplay, minimize, or ignore your body’s signals telling you it’s time to rest. Your body will never deceive you when you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or exhausted.
As a life coach, I’m here to help you begin making positive changes and find better balance in your life so that you can live a peace-filled life.
Need more help? Let’s work together to create a life that aligns with what’s most important to you.
Also, check out this episode from my podcast! Learn how to feel better about yourself and how you run your business. Remember, it’s always a good time to prioritize your well-being and shape your life according to your desires.
