A picture of two women with the words overt masculine and feminine woman.

Feminine and Masculine Energy: How They Impact Women

Emotional Regulation / Spirituality
Reading Time: 8 minutes

Do you know that there are two entities residing inside of you? And no, I’m not hallucinating. I am referring to your physical and spiritual bodies. As a woman, you possess both feminine and masculine energies that assist you in all aspects of your life.

However, if your energy is imbalanced, it may cause various issues in your personal and professional life. As a life and business coach, over the years, I have seen women particularly lose opportunities because of this energy.

In this article, we will explain each energy type and allow you to decide whether you would like to embody feminine or masculine energy as a woman.

About Feminine and Masculine Energy

Psychologist Carl Jung said that each person has the energetic characteristics of a man and a woman. They are called the archetypes of the Anima and Animus. A man has the body of a man, but the soul of a woman. The woman has the body of a woman, but the soul of a man. Interesting, his wife Emma wrote the book Anima and Animus, which goes into further detail about it.

If you want a modern take on this approach, read the book “Invisible Partners,” by John A Sanford.

Anyway, your feminine and masculine energies ebb and flow within you based on your biochemistry and prior experiences (exposure to modeling from family/friends during our formative childhood years (also known as scripting)). 

Important: Energy types are not general characteristics of what femininity versus masculinity traits MUST be. 

Feminine energy is just as powerful as masculine energy. For example, one can be a man and have dominate female energy in terms of creativity and ideas.

Also, energy levels are neither good nor bad. They are neither helpful nor hurtful. However, you need balance between the different energy types in order to be successful in all areas of your life. This is important so that you don’t slip into unproductive and unhelpful behaviors.

A woman sitting on top of a couch talking to another person.

Feminine Energy

“Feminine energy” is passive, patient, and vulnerable. This kind of energy permits individuals to recognize their instincts (natural reactions, not thoughts) and to seek pleasure. 

Desiring and cherishing care and attention from others constitutes feminine energy as well. The key characteristic of feminine energy is receiving energy from other people, places, and things. 

This enables one to be loving, creative, receptive, free-flowing, passive, graceful, free-thinking, gentle, playful, holistic, and heart-centered, and also enables them to be an earth-mother or father.

Masculine Energy

“Masculine energy” is competitive, controlling, and focused on conquering. It allows you to act on your intuition, have insights or thoughts and protect those you love. Wanting respect from others is a masculine trait. 

Other characteristics of masculine energy include giving energy in a direct way. Traits such as being legalistic, linear, disciplined, providing, protecting, active, stoic, direct, systems-oriented, head-centered, and proactive are all part of masculine energy.

In the next section, we will discuss what happens to you energetically if you embody too much feminine or masculine energy.

A woman sitting at a table looking down at papers.

Overt masculine energy

Traits of the overtly masculine woman 

I was raised to be a very masculine woman, so I am well acquainted with the idea of competing, controlling, and conquering. These were the three Cs I lived by.

Over the years, I have read and listened to some really heartfelt messages from women who tell me, “Denise, I am told that I need to achieve. To be ambitious and do good, but my behavior is intimidating to others. What should I do?” I get it. Society is confusing. They tell you to be strong, powerful, vocal, hardworking, tenacious, and opinionated. 

However, being strong, powerful, and vocal can cause you to irritate, intimidate, and frustrate others with insecurities. The fact of the matter is, nobody likes an intimidating person. To make matters worse, being overly aggressive is hazardous to one’s health.

Health impacts to being an overtly masculine woman

Ladies, we are not the weaker sex, and our physical frame may be smaller, but we have a larger corpus callosum, which allows us to switch easily between thoughts and emotions. However, stress can impact our body adversely. Thus operating from a performance-oriented mindset, or “perfectionistis,” makes us more prone to sickness. 
 
Often we forgo self-care activities like meditation, and rest because we don’t see their immediate benefits. We think, “I cannot possibly rest because there’s too much work to do!” 
 
However, operating like a masculine man, i.e., from a performance-oriented mindset, can cause immense strain on our nervous system, leading to health issues like high anxiety, irritable bowel syndrome, inflammatory diseases, muscle pain, insomnia, just to name a few.
 
Therefore, it is crucial to prioritize taking care of ourselves over doing more work.

Overt feminine energy

Did you read about masculine energy and think, “I’m glad I’m not controlling and dominating”? You may be someone who goes with the flow. I bet you may have enjoyed movies like YaYa Sisterhood or Eat, Pray, Love and have a lotus flower tattoo.

Although you’re more laid back, there are still risks to being too feminine. While you may not be as forceful as a masculine woman, you should still be careful about how much energy you’re putting out into the world.

Emotional doormat

Have you seen a woman who seems hesitant to say anything that could be considered critical? For example, her partner/spouse has a habit that irritates her, but because she is too concerned with “not rocking the boat,” the only person she talks to about it is everyone but her significant other. 

Or what about the woman who is trying her best to grow her business? She does a great job of helping her clients but unfortunately undercharges her prices and frequently works unpaid because she is afraid of “losing business.” 

These are signs of an emotional doormat. This poor woman internalizes all of her discomfort because she doesn’t want anyone to feel upset. Unfortunately, this approach causes her to suffer emotionally and physically because she fails to communicate her feelings with others. 

The overtly feminine woman just believes that eventually, other people will recognize their behavior and sense her discomfort. Unfortunately, this never happens. If anything, the overtly feminine woman is teaching the people around her to misuse her trust and affection. 

Listen, if you don’t stand up for yourself, inevitably, people will take advantage of you.

 

via GIPHY

Procrastinator/Avoidant

Nobody likes to confront things that upset them. I once had a client named Gayle (not her real name) who avoided getting professional help for her business. It wasn’t until seven years and thousands of dollars later that she reached out to me for business coaching support.
 
The overtly feminine woman doesn’t want to hear or do anything that will shatter her fragile self-esteem. As such, she will procrastinate, avoid, and deny even the most glaring problems in her life. And to make it worse, all that avoidance has a nasty way of destroying your inner confidence.
 
From health problems to her professional life, she thinks that if she buries her head in the proverbial sand long enough, her issues will resolve themselves. In reality, the entire time her issues, and everyone around her, are patiently waiting for her to acknowledge reality.
 

There is hope if you are an overtly masculine or feminine woman! In the next section, you will learn some tools that can help you if you identify with either category.

A picture of two women with the words overt masculine and feminine woman.

Balancing your energy 

If you are overtly masculine 

1. Please stop acting like a man and take off those fake balls you have been parading around town. Others feel bad, and you feel even worse trying to muscle people into doing your will 24/7. 

2. Challenge your current communication style. While your mother or father may have had good intentions, they gave you a way of communicating that doesn’t work well for you in the real world. It is time to rewire your Broca (the part of your brain that controls speech) and recognize when your language is being used to compete, conquer, and control others. 

3. Be clear on who you really are. Ask yourself if you really want to be a masculine woman who does good, or a feminine woman who feels good. It might lower your stress and help you enjoy life more.

4. Give yourself permission to rest! Self care is essential to help you not only clear your mind but improve yourself the clarity to prioritize what matters most in your life. 

You can still be powerful, yet not let the power ruin your health

As I write this message to you, I am fully embracing my masculine energy. With all my energy, I want to convey that most of the time, I am in my feminine energy, which is passive, receptive, and vulnerable. During those moments, I yield to the leadership of my husband, I am curious and receptive to my clients’ thoughts, and I am playful with my son. But ultimately, it is up to you to decide how you want to present yourself to your romantic partner and everyone else in your life. 

Unfortunately, western culture has made it seem like femininity in women is a negative trait. Women think they have to compete, conquer, and control at all times, leading to stress and exhaustion.

While your masculine energy is helpful during immediate and urgent situations, don’t let it dominate your health or relationships.

Lastly, I have an essential message for women who overly embrace their femininity energy.

 

If you are overtly feminine

I understand that you believe that by maintaining good vibes and positive thoughts, your dreams will come true. However, you passively wait for things to happen while life passes you by. On the outside, you feel nervous, edgy, and slightly irritated while watching others with weaker skills achieve their dreams seemingly faster than you do.

Now is the time to:

  1. Build your inner backbone. If something bothers you, speak up! None of us can read minds. Communicating with others clears up misunderstandings and creates more authentic connections. Read this article if you have difficulties communicating with others.
  2. Take control of your life. Observing your mother or father as the perpetual wallflower may have influenced you, but it does not serve you as an adult. If you have goals, get the assistance and accountability you need. As humans, we tend to stick to our routines and may need intervention to accomplish our goals.
  3. Address old emotional wounds. If you have yourself habitually denying yourself all in the name of people-pleasing, perhaps now is the time to address some old hurts.

In the final section, I will summarize my thoughts on feminine and masculine energy.”

Final Thoughts about Feminine and Masculine Energy

There is nothing wrong with masculine or feminine energy. We need both. For example, I have more masculine energy while at work. I also need my feminine energy in order to be creative and preserve my mental and spiritual energy. However, being too overtly feminine or masculine creates its unique challenges.

Based on the information shared in this article, you must decide if you need more or less feminine or masculine energy. If you need help, don’t hesitate to contact me.

To dig deeper, click here to listen to this episode from my entrepreneur  podcast about learning how voices from the past can influence you on an energetic level or press the play button below.

Picture of Written by Denise G. Lee

Written by Denise G. Lee

Hey there! Since 2013, I’ve been a Healing and Leadership Coach helping leaders stop the chaos and start thriving. From trauma and anxiety to all the messy stuff life throws your way, I’m here to dish out a mix of psychology and real-talk with zero fluff. If you're ready to drop the excuses and lead with purpose, it's time to 'Heal, Grow, and Lead'—because, let’s be real, thriving isn't just for everyone else. It's your turn, too.
DISCLAIMER: THIS ARTICLE DOES NOT PROVIDE MENTAL HEALTH ADVICE

The information in this article is for informational purposes only. No material in this article or website is intended to be a substitute for professional medical and/or mental health advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Also, this article is not designed to diagnose or treat yourself or anyone with a suspected mental health illness.

Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition or treatment and before undertaking a new health care regimen, and never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you read from me or anyone else online.

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