Imposter Syndrome: Tips for Entrepreneurs with Trauma History
Hey there, awesome humans! I’m Denise G Lee, your friendly neighborhood healing and leadership coach. Today, we’re diving into a topic that’s super important for leaders and business owners: imposter syndrome, especially for those of us with trauma histories. Buckle up, because we’re about to get real and maybe even a little silly (in the best way possible, of course).
But first, let’s discuss why this issue is important.
The Importance of Addressing Imposter Syndrome for Leaders and Entrepreneurs
Why is this such a big deal for leaders and entrepreneurs? Imposter syndrome can be like a sneaky little gremlin sitting on your shoulder, whispering doubts in your ear just when you’re about to do something amazing. It can cripple decision-making, stifle creativity, and hold you back from fully embracing your role.
When you doubt your abilities, inspiring others or leading effectively becomes a challenge. This self-doubt can spiral into a cycle of fear that prevents you from seizing opportunities that could elevate your career or business.
This isn’t just something I write about; it’s something I know. Imposter syndrome once held me back from starting a blog—I believed I had neither the accreditation nor the experience. It kept me from reaching out to accomplished therapists and medical doctors, assuming they wouldn’t bother talking to me about trauma. All that noise in my head limited potential collaborations, stunted my impact, and damaged my self-worth. Well, no more! If I can face these issues as a trauma survivor, so can you.
I know this isn’t as easy as reading affirmations or attending a wellness retreat. Your mind may be more affected by trauma than you realize. In the next section, let’s talk about how past traumatic experiences shape your beliefs about yourself.
The Trauma-Imposter Syndrome Connection: How Past Experiences Shape Our Beliefs
Now, let’s talk about how trauma and imposter syndrome are like two peas in a really annoying pod. When we’ve been through tough stuff, it can mess with our sense of self-worth and make us feel like we don’t deserve good things.
And because of that, everything that is new and novel seems not worth the risk.
From personal experience, I know there have been countless times when I talked myself out of asking questions, reaching out, or sending messages to potential clients, business associates, and anyone who might help me personally or professionally. I felt like I didn’t measure up to an impossibly high standard—one that I created in my own mind. It’s a special kind of hell, being stuck because you’re the one keeping yourself hostage. A jailer that never takes a break or allows you to rest from scrutinizing every single move you make.
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a big-time trauma expert, says, “The body keeps the score.” This means that even if we think we’re over our past experiences, our bodies and brains might still be holding onto that stuff.
For entrepreneurs and leaders, this can show up in all sorts of ways:
- Doubting your business ideas
- Feeling like you don’t deserve success
- Being afraid to charge what you’re worth
- Constantly comparing yourself to others
- Feeling like a fraud when you get praise or recognition
Sound familiar? Don’t worry; we’re going to tackle all of this head-on. Next, let’s talk more about how our brains are rewired by trauma and how it affects our sense of self-worth.
The Science Behind Imposter Syndrome: Understanding the Psychological Patterns
Alright, let’s get our nerd on for a minute. Imposter syndrome isn’t just in your head (well, technically it is, but you know what I mean). There’s actual science behind why we feel this way.
Dr. Valerie Young, an expert on imposter syndrome, says, “The impostor syndrome is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a ‘fraud’.” Basically, your brain is playing tricks on you, making you think you’re not as awesome as you really are. For those of us with trauma histories, our brains might be extra good at these tricks.
Trauma can rewire our brains, making us more likely to doubt ourselves and our abilities. It’s like our brains are trying to protect us from getting hurt again, but instead, they’re just holding us back from greatness. But there’s good news: the brain is plastic and can heal. We’ll discuss that in more detail later. But first, let’s talk about how we can heal our minds through taking care of our bodies.
The Importance of Self-Care in Battling Imposter Syndrome
Okay, let’s talk about something super important: self-care. When you’re dealing with imposter syndrome—especially if you have a trauma history—taking care of yourself is crucial.
Self-care isn’t just about bubble baths and face masks (although those are awesome too). It’s about treating yourself with kindness and respect. Here are some self-care practices that can help combat imposter syndrome:
- Get enough sleep: Seriously; your brain needs rest to function properly.
- Move your body: Exercise can help reduce stress and boost confidence.
- Eat nourishing foods: Fuel your body and brain with good stuff.
- Practice mindfulness: Meditation or deep breathing can help calm your mind.
- Set boundaries: It’s okay to say no to things that drain you.
- Celebrate your wins: No matter how small; take time to acknowledge your accomplishments.
- Spend time in nature: Getting outside can help put things in perspective.
Remember; self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary for you to be the best leader and entrepreneur you can be. You cannot change your mindset while abusing your body. Don’t put the cart in front of the horse. Take care your body and your mind will thank you in kind.
Now, in the next sections, we will discuss practical strategies you can use to show imposter syndrome the door and how you can view your past trauma as a sign of strength rather than weakness. Let’s get into this!
Strategies for Kicking Imposter Syndrome to the Curb
Alright, let’s get down to the good stuff. How can we tell imposter syndrome to take a hike? Here are some strategies that have worked for me and my clients:
1. Name It to Tame It: Acknowledging Your Feelings
Let’s be honest, imposter syndrome can feel like an uninvited guest barging in when you’re on a roll. When it shows up, just say, “Oh hey, imposter syndrome. I see you, but I’m not buying what you’re selling.” Call it out for what it is—a pesky thought, not the truth. It’s like acknowledging a shadow so it doesn’t start to loom too large.
2. Keep a Win Jar: Celebrating Your Successes
Start collecting your wins. Every time you knock out a goal—whether it’s a big milestone or a small victory—write it down and put it in a jar. Then, on those days when imposter syndrome wants to pull you down, pull out a win and remind yourself just how far you’ve come. Those wins? They’re proof that you’ve got this.
3. Practice Self-Compassion: Be Your Own Best Friend
Let’s keep it real. If your best friend came to you saying, “I feel like a fraud,” you wouldn’t say, “Yeah, you probably are.” No way! You’d remind them of all the reasons they’re crushing it. Talk to yourself with that same kindness. Because who better than you to cheer yourself on?
4. Reframe Your Thoughts: Changing the Narrative
Imposter thoughts can be sneaky: “I got lucky,” or “I’m not as good as they think.” Next time they pop up, replace them with truth bombs: “I earned this,” or “I’m here because I put in the work.” Think of it as rewriting the script in your head. You’re more than qualified, and if you’re learning, that’s just part of the process.
Bonus Tip: Let go of obsessing over outcomes. When we stop fixating on what might happen, we get to live the moment fully. I’ve been chatting about this online—click the link to jump into the convo.
Someone asked me today, "How do I become more brave?"
— Denise G. Lee (@DeniseGLee) October 1, 2024
My answer: Care less about outcomes or reactions.
Too many of us are walking on eggshells, hoping and praying we don't offend the wrong people.
We think if we get approval from the RIGHT people, we’ll feel better about…
5. Embrace Your Quirks: Celebrating Uniqueness
Your quirks and experiences aren’t just “extra” parts of you—they’re the secret sauce that makes you unique. There’s no “perfect” way to be an entrepreneur, so don’t bother trying to fit into some fake mold. Show up as yourself; there’s power in your authenticity.
6. Connect with Others: Building a Support Network
Imposter syndrome wants you to feel isolated, but here’s the truth: most entrepreneurs have been there. Talk to others in the trenches with you, share your highs and lows, and realize you’re in good company. Having a support network changes everything.
7. Get Professional Help: Seeking Guidance from Experts
Sometimes, talking things out with a therapist or coach can make all the difference (hello, that’s what I’m here for!). Processing past stuff and building confidence is part of the work, and you don’t have to do it solo.
Remember, kicking imposter syndrome isn’t a quick fix; it’s a process. So celebrate each step forward. Rewrite those tired old narratives, and remind yourself daily: you’re capable, you’re here, and you’re doing the work.
The image below summarizes these seven tips.
And yes, I know these tips aren’t enough. That’s why you need to rewrite the words you tell yourself. The next section explains how to do that.
Rewriting Your Internal Narrative: Changing the Stories We Tell Ourselves
A lot of imposter syndrome comes from the stories we tell ourselves—maybe you’ve been telling yourself things like:
- “I’m not smart enough to run a business.”
- “I don’t deserve success because of my past.”
- “Everyone else has it all figured out except me.”
It’s time to rewrite those stories! Here’s how:
- Notice your negative self-talk: Pay attention to the things you tell yourself.
- Challenge those thoughts: Ask yourself “Is this really true? What evidence do I have?”
- Replace negative thoughts with positive ones: Instead of “I’m not smart enough,” try “I’m learning every day.”
- Practice practice practice: Changing your internal narrative takes time but it’s so worth it!
Remember; you’re the author of your own story—make it a bestseller!
The Role of Failure in Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
Let’s talk about something that scares many people—failure! When you’re dealing with imposter syndrome; failure can feel like confirmation of all your worst fears! But here’s the truth—failure is normal—even necessary—as part of success!
J.K.Rowling once said; “It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all—in which case—you fail by default.”
Here’s how to reframe failure:
- See it as learning opportunity: Every failure teaches you something!
- Recognize failure doesn’t define you: You are not your failures!
- Celebrate attempts: Taking risks is brave regardless of outcome!
- Use failure as motivation: Let it fuel determination!
- Share failures openly: Talking about them reduces their power over you!
Remember; every successful person has failed many times—it’s part of the journey!
Building a Support Network: Finding Your Tribe
You know that saying “It takes a village”? Well, it’s not just for raising kids! Building a strong support network is super important for overcoming imposter syndrome and healing from trauma.
Here are some ways to build your support squad:
- Find a mentor: Look for someone who’s been where you are who can offer guidance.
- Join a mastermind group: Connect with other entrepreneurs who get what you’re going through.
- Attend networking events: Meet other business owners and leaders in your industry.
- Seek out therapy or coaching: Professional support can make a huge difference.
- Connect with friends and family: Don’t forget about the people who’ve been there for you all along.
- Join online communities: There are tons of great groups for entrepreneurs on social media.
Remember; asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength!
Real-Life Examples of Imposter Syndrome Butt-Kicking
Let’s look at some real-life examples of people who’ve kicked imposter syndrome to the curb:
- Sarah, a tech startup founder, used to think she didn’t belong in the male-dominated tech world. She started a “brag book” where she wrote down all her accomplishments and positive feedback. Now, whenever she feels like an imposter, she reads through her book and remembers how far she’s come.
- Mike, a life coach with a history of childhood trauma, struggled to believe he could help others when he still felt broken himself. He started practicing daily affirmations and gradually learned to see his past struggles as a source of strength and empathy for his clients.
- Lena, a successful artist, always felt like her work wasn’t good enough. She started sharing her creative process on social media, showing the messy, imperfect parts. Not only did this help her feel more authentic, but her followers loved seeing the real her.
These are just a few examples of how people have overcome imposter syndrome. Remember that what works for one person might not work for another; so don’t be afraid to experiment and find what works for you.
Alright! I hope you found all these tips helpful. Next, I’ll share my final thoughts.
Final Thoughts
Alright awesome humans—we’ve covered lot ground here! Imposter syndrome tough cookie especially dealing past trauma—but here’s what I want remember:
- You are NOT alone so many successful people deal!
- Past experiences including trauma part makes unique valuable leader entrepreneur!
- Impostor Syndrome NOT fact—it’s feeling feelings change!
- You have power rewrite internal narrative build confidence!
- Embracing vulnerability imperfection actually makes stronger leader!
- Self-care self-reflection crucial tools overcoming impostor syndrome!
- You worthy success happiness good things life offers!
Remember overcoming impostor syndrome journey—not destination! Be patient celebrate progress keep pushing forward! So, which tip or idea works best for you? Let me know by using this link.
If ready kick impostor syndrome curb step into power as leader entrepreneur—don’t hesitate to work with me.
And hey, if you want to dive deeper, check out this podcast episode. It’s like this article but with a more charming voice and way more cheesy jokes! Alrighty then, you’ve got this, rockstar! Now go out there and show the world how amazing YOU ARE!
